Tag: desire

Is Your Creatress Running the Show?

by Chantal Pierrat

There is a ‘She’ inside of you that is unstoppable.

‘She’ is the High Priestess of Manifestation.

‘She’ is the Warrioress.

‘She’ is the Confident Goddess.

‘She’ hunts down fears, insecurities and feelings of inadequacy.

‘She’ is the full embodiment of feminine strength, power and beauty.

All women have a unique ‘She’ screaming to come out.

Craving to be fully self-expressed.

Seeking to live the full potential of her purpose.

‘She’ is also hungry for something that we don’t talk about that much….

‘She’ has a lust to bring to the surface secret desires, sexual fantasies and yearnings for mystical encounters. And the most interesting part is that most of the time, women don’t even know it.

Why?

We are so busy taking care of business, taking care of others, that we numb ourselves from our most intimate desires. We don’t even know they are there. But we feel them!

I see this in every intimate conversation I have with women. Even women who tell me they have it all. There is always something deeper; it’s an intuitive feeling that they might be missing out on something.

That something is having ‘Her’ be in charge of the show. And for that to happen, you have to find ‘Her’ and turn ‘Her’ on.

And when ‘She’ is turned-on, you have access to your most intimate longings and desires.

The desires that you have repressed because you don’t believe you can have them, you think they are wrong and crazy. It’s simply because you haven’t activated all your power to attain them.

‘She’ is Spirit talking to you and working through you.

‘She’ wants to access higher dimensions and to be immersed in spiritual knowledge and service.

‘She’ is the one that wants to say yes to her intuition at every moment, so there is no reason to worry about anything, ever.

‘She’ is the one who is so damn sexy that she calls into her life exactly what she wants.

‘She’ is so powerful that she always knows what to say, do, be or act.

‘She’ is the one that experiences orgasmic pleasure.

‘She’ is the real you.

*Excerpt from Raquel Vasallo’s #1 Best Selling Book – Spiritual Seductress, The High-Powered-Women’s Guide to Devouring the World Through Spiritual Guidance


Raquel Vasallo will be a featured speaker on the Sister Stage at Emerging Women Live 2017. She will also be available for intimate 1-on-1 coaching sessions at the event, and will lead a group coaching circle that you won’t want to miss. Register here to join us for an unforgettable weekend of women’s leadership, Oct. 5-8th at the Westin Hotel in Downtown Denver, CO.

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Raquel Vasallo is the #1 Best Selling Author of Spiritual Seductress, The High-Powered Women’s Guide to Devour the World through Spiritual Guidance. She is an International Speaker, Elite Spiritual Advisor, Seduction Artist and Provocateur.

Struck by a car in 2008, Raquel’s near-death experience elicited a supreme spiritual awakening. She quit her successful career as a NYC architect and embarked on her work as a Spiritual Seductress.

Raquel plays with high powered luminaries and leaders, seducing their secret desires to live an outrageously turned-on and spiritually tuned-in life. She mentors women, worldwide, on the art of channeling goddess cosmic energy to magnetize opportunities for wealth, divine love, enlightened sex, spiritual guidance and highest purpose.

To receive Divine Whispers to ravish the world, visit www.spiritualseductress.com

Is there Magic in the Mess?

by Chantal Pierrat

Dear Emerging Women,

It’s been almost 6 months since our annual Emerging Women Live event, and a lot has transpired since then. A LOT. There is a deep political and social disharmony being felt in our country right now. There is a dis-ease being felt in the world. And women worldwide are at the front lines of creating a new world order.

One thing I know for sure, when we are creating a new paradigm, there is no blueprint. And it can get messy. But today, I am cultivating gratitude for the mess. Here’s why:

“In all chaos there is a cosmos, in all disorder a secret order.” – Carl Jung

Chaos puts us in touch with our desires

I’m not saying that mess is the end-game. I dream of – I yearn for and actively work toward – equality, justice, peace, civility. And on a micro level, it’s nice to have things run smoothly: to have a perfect business model, to have people on your team that are high performers and super easy to work with, to have clarity of vision and heart. But in order to get to those exalted, beautiful, non-messy things, we have to work through some serious chaos to get clear on what we want to see in our lives, and in the world.

“NOOO!” is my knee-jerk reaction to chaos. If feels unsafe and scary. But when there is chaos around us it gives us permission to stop trying to make sense of everything and just feel. When darkness descends, there is no way to move forward unless we feel our way, one touch at a time, from heartbeat to heartbeat. And it is through this feeling state that we can know our true desires. What do we want this new world to look like? What kind of life do we want to live?

Chaos connects us to our deepest, truest selves

When we are in the unknown, our usual landmarks are disrupted and we have nothing else to rely on but the ground of our beingness. Sounds True founder Tami Simon named “spending time in a place with no reference points” as one of her 5 Principles of Being True at Emerging Women Power Night. So it’s okay to feel off the map, out of your depth, messy. The key to resilience lies in having a close, intimate relationship with ourselves. This becomes our most trusted and constant reference point in times of uncertainty. From this place we can start to align with what feels true for us in the outer world.

Disorder brings people together

I think what I fear the most is an environment that does not allow for mess, that does not allow for exploration outside of the box. So let’s not do that thing that we women seem to do so often: strive for perfection. I vote for real conversations and fumbling with words over getting it right. I vote for epic failures in the name of change over risk avoidance and playing small. We need to organize and work together, we need to grow into our feminine humanity, and we need to let others to do the same – at their own pace and via their own path. So let’s give ourselves a wide berth, margin for error, and the benefit of the doubt that She knows what she is doing. After all, we are not doing this alone – we cannot do this alone – so what choice do we have but to come together with the best of intentions and drop the “shoulds?”

The Feminine thrives in chaos

“In chaos, there is fertility.” – Anaïs Nin

Life is messy when we are navigating uncharted waters, and yet somebody has to lead the way. Collectively, women are rising up to take their place as leaders in a world that is both thirsty for and resistant to this change. We are at the beginning of a new era in the women’s movement, and this time we are doing it with the cosmic feminine on our side.

Today’s world of disparaging views and conflict is the perfect environment for the feminine to rise, and She is rising like She has never risen before. I want to know what the world looks like, what business, politics, and an economy looks like, under a paradigm for society where the feminine is fully expressed. We know what the world looks like under a masculine paradigm (boy does that feel like it’s run it’s course) – and it’s going to take some dismantling to make room for new growth.

The patriarchy hates mess. It relies on order, logic, adherence. So in these times of seeming madness, I say let things break. Because the feminine will grow through the cracks.

“Chaos is what we’ve lost touch with. This is why it is given a bad name. It is feared by the dominant archetype of our world, which is Ego, which clenches because its existence is defined in terms of control.” – Terence McKenna

The strive for order seems to be the goal of the ego, but let’s make a pledge to surrender that ego, embrace the mess, and listen to our desires, trusting that they will lead us in our work to make the world a better place for all.

Chantal Pierrat Big Love,
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Chantal Pierrat | Founder, Emerging Women

Esther Perel: Gender, Fluidity, and Desire

by Chantal Pierrat

More exciting news, Feministas! We are thrilled to tell you that Esther Perel will be joining us at Emerging Women Live 2017 October 5-8th in Denver, CO. Why are we so pumped?

We find that stepping into your sexual power can be crucial to stepping into your full power as a feminine leader. What does one have to do with the other? If we’re disconnected from the flame that’s inside of us, nothing’s gonna happen. People will feel it (or feel something missing) and we’ll be exhausted from running on fumes.

Esther Perel is a penetrating observer of social and cultural patterns shaping our relationships: with our partners, with our desires, with our sexuality, with ourselves. At Emerging Women Live 2015, she invited us to imagine we were gathered for happy hour, favorite cocktails or mocktails in hand, and she asked us what she calls the 5 essential questions:

Why does good sex fade even with couples who continue to love each other? Why does intimacy not guarantee good sex? Why does sex make babies while parenting kills sex drive? Can we want what we already have? And why is the exotic so erotic?

We were HOOKED.

Here’s a few snippets from our Emerging Women podcast “The Fluidity of Desire” to help you get a feel for Esther’s brilliant perspective on women and desire in the modern age. Listen to the full podcast to hear more (plus get the benefits of hearing Esther talk about desire in a French accent).


Enjoy!

Excerpts from The Fluidity of Desire with Esther Perel & Chantal Pierrat

EP: Many women in this age of perfection have to learn to just say, “It’s enough for today. And now me,” rather than, “Wait!” She’s exasperated or frustrated or something beyond, and then she doesn’t know how to experience desire because then she experiences deserving. Now she’s in the realm of resentment and now she doesn’t just say “I want,” she says, “I deserve,” right?

“Deserving” is wanting a prize. Some people don’t feel that they are allowed to want so they have to be at the end of their ropes to finally say, “Now me!” But then they say it with such violence and with such an aggression that they can shake up the whole house.

That’s what happens many times in relationships. She doesn’t say it earlier when it’s just, “Hey, I feel like it, I want to,” she screams it: “I deserve! I’ve had it! I’ve had enough!” And then she blames him or her or whoever else is around her for not being allowed to say this sooner.

In fact, she just doesn’t feel like she can say it sooner because she first needs to be perfect, have it all done, and then she feels that desire is a reward rather than that desire is basically part of her human right.

CP:When we’re living in that loop of perfection, then that criticism can’t help but spill out. Because we’re putting so much on ourselves, we bring those standards to our relationships, and then it’s nothing but “lack” and “criticism” and “not good enough” on both the inside and the outside.

EP: It’s really kind of an epidemic at this point, yes? You’ve got the most confident, successful, powerful group of women in history walking around constantly with an inner voice of “flawed, and critical, and not enough.” It’s just tragic. And, I should add, resentful, because, “How can you sit down when there is so much to do? Don’t you see?” But why don’t you just sit down? Does it really matter? Is that going to be written on your epitaph? “You cleaned when…” or “You organized and labeled when…” or whatever? Or, “You deprived yourself nicely”?

It’s a very interesting thing to help women allow themselves the permission to experience pleasure, which is really where desire resides. To experience freedom, to experience autonomy, and all of that, we end up instantly feeling selfish and guilty.

CP: Well, what’s interesting about what you’re saying is that because we’re kind of hardwired to touch into our desire through the other, it’s hard to get in touch with that. It’s like a muscle we have to flex to find the source of our desire within.

EP: We rekindle desire by rekindling, first of all, the permission to think about oneself and not in the productive, instrumental way. The erotic is totally unproductive. You accomplish nothing. It’s just a state of aliveness and of vitality and of sensuality.

We are sexual beings, and sexuality isn’t how often she has sex and how long the sex lasts and how many orgasms she has. It’s basically a connection with her erotic self. It’s a much broader definition of sexuality, one where we talk about reaching desire, and that’s the progression that she needs to go through.

CP: I think a lot of what holds us back as women is this lack of ownership on that individual level of our own desire, and also lack of self-acceptance. We’re working on freeing ourselves from this perfection and actually kind of falling in love with ourselves so that we are a turn on, not just in terms of our relationships, but that we can have that juice and charisma and energy, frankly, to lead in a way that’s empowerful and impactful.

EP: But then we will need to learn that our appreciation of ourselves doesn’t become perfect, but more like how Brené Brown talks about it, because we welcome the gift of imperfection. If we actually are more compassionate with ourselves, we accept our imperfections, we’re not agreeing to sell everything, and we seem like ourselves and can even get a good laugh at it, then we will be in a much better place.

CP: What do you recommend for women, especially, to grab onto in this era of… “chaos” is kind of a strong word… but an era of new? Everything’s  being re-created and we’re rethinking everything. What’s something solid that we can hold onto that we can fall back on and know that it’s always going to be there?

EP: People. People. Community. That’s the only thing we have in this world. We don’t have the traditional pillars, we don’t have the models. What we have is conversation, which is really what your gathering is about, creating real-life, embodied experiences where people come together and discuss all the dilemmas of love and living.

And in those conversations, bit by bit, we dismantle and we challenge the old hierarchy. It’s time for women to be angry without being considered bitches or aggressive or masculine. It’s time for them to not constantly worry about being liked. It’s time that they think that they can ask for the same amount that the men are asking. It’s time that she feel that she can be seductive without thinking that she’s a slut. It’s time that she can integrate femininity and power as part of her success and her activation story.

It’s all these divisions, basically, dismantling the patriarchy, if you want to put a name on it. But what will replace it isn’t a matriarchy and it’s not genderless, it’s gender-fluid. It’s different. We are just living way too long these days to just abide by one model. And they understand it in the professional world, in the business world, the tech world. Everything is about multiplicity. When it comes to gender identity and relationships, we are left with very little monolithic, narrowly thought out models that don’t serve us anymore. They just don’t serve us.

So what happens is that people get blamed for not succeeding, right? You get blamed because you’re divorced, but nobody ever questions if the model of marriage is so sound. Why do we think marriage is a sound arrangement? And the people who don’t succeed, they’re the failures? And [it’s the same] for everything else. If you can succeed with children, it’s not because there’s a lack of childcare and a lack of good schools and a lack of this and that. It’s because you [know how] to juggle your schedule.

And so we are privatizing social problems and making the individual responsible for it. And I think that if women come together, the biggest challenge is not to think that it’s just a matter of each woman on their own, coming up with societal solutions to society’s problems. They need to be connective solutions for connective problems, in which she is a piece of the voice, that she’s not responsible on her own to deal with the lack of support that the system should provide her. To me, that is going to be the biggest shift that women can offer these days. It’s actually a challenge to the excesses of individualism.

I can’t even tell you, just from this week, with the amount of women I met, how often my eyes fill up. I’m thinking, “You carry a load, don’t you, and you actually think you should. And you still think that you’re not carrying it well enough.” I’m thinking, “My God, can we stop personalizing difficulties that are systemic, as if they’re your personal challenge?” It’s not like that, it’s really bigger than you, and we have to remember that it’s bigger than you, and then all come together and address it and make those changes.

And then our lives will be better and so will the lives of the people around us, because we will be less upset. And rather than thinking we’re upset because we can’t do it all, we will be upset because we are thinking that we should do it all.

CP: Amen, sister. May it be so!

Early Bird discounts expire at the end of the month, so save your seat now!

Want to Dial Into Desire? Love the Longing.

by Chantal Pierrat

Have you ever wanted something so very bad your whole body ached? I am talking about a desire so profound that it wraps itself around your heart… and squeezes. As we long for the fulfillment of that desire, a feeling of separateness from the desired thing often begins to form. And if that separateness is allowed to solidify, it can become literally heartbreaking.

I’ve felt that gulf between desire and outcome a lot lately. I’ve watched my country make decisions I don’t understand, the course I set for my business keeps taking unexpected turns, and several new relationships in my life are not panning out the way I had hoped. At times like these sometimes I just want… well, not to want.

In Buddhism, the Four Noble Truths are aimed at freeing ourselves from our desires in order to end our suffering. This makes so much sense – if I don’t want, I cannot be without, and I can’t be disappointed. Freedom! Oh to be free of wanting – how civilized that must be. To walk about the world with such contentment, such satisfaction with what is and watch all the shiny objects pass us by without the grip of desire!

Still, I can’t help but think that desire must have some function besides to torture us. Surely an energy so strong, and at times all-consuming must have a greater purpose?

Emerging Women desire

Do Our Desires Evolve Us?

At a very basic level our desire for food, water, safety, and procreation keeps humanity going. Isn’t the purpose of all of life is to expand, evolve, to grow and spread? Maybe there’s a case to be made that what we desire will likely lead to our growth and expansion.

Could it be that we naturally long for things that will help us evolve? Having longed for a few “bad boys” and risky experiences in my day, I question this. But then again, the personal expansion that came from those experiences are undeniable. The more I lean into this, the more I am convinced: desire, regardless of the object or the outcome, can lead to transformation.

Do Our Desires Reveal Our Purpose?

Maybe we don’t have desires, we are our desires. In that case, if we run from our desires, we run from ourselves. I believe Spirit can talk to us through our desires, helping to reveal our true purpose. Do you?

A desire is anything but frivolous. It is the interface between you and that which is greater than you. No desire is meaningless or inconsequential. If it pulls you, even a little bit, it will take everyone higher. Desire is where the Divine lives, inside the inspiration of your desire. Every desire is of profound importance with huge consequences, and deserves your attention.

Mama Gena

Do Our Desires Create Connection?

As an experiment, I started leaning into my desires. Not the images or visions I have of the end result, but the physical and energetic pull on my heart, the heat on my skin, the stretching of my soul as I reach. The desiring itself. When I stay there, I don’t feel pain or separation, but an increased intimacy with… me.

Buddhist teacher Tara Brach has said, “Longing, felt fully, carries us to belonging.” My desires shifted from a source of pain and separation to guideposts for deeper connection – to self, to others, to God/the universe/the force. The movement toward something reminds me that I am not alone. As I reach my hands out for what I want, I know that somewhere another is doing the same, and perhaps our fingertips shall meet. I desire for Emerging Women to be globally impactful – yes. But what I really want is to feel connected to women everywhere who are risking everything to live authentically for the good of the world. And in the simple act of desire, I already feel that powerful connection.

Do Our Desires Shape the World Around Us?

As women, we have a history of suppressing our desires. We may not speak up, we may not ask for what we need, we may avoid making waves and stay safe in the caretaking of others while neglecting our own wants. At Emerging Women Live 2015, Esther Perel said, “As women we need to own our wanting.” Damn straight, sisters. How can we expect the world to work in our favor if we don’t allow ourselves to want? What good is dreaming if we don’t infuse our visions with the catalytic fire of desire? To dare to want in the face of possible disappointment, shame, or guilt – now that is courage.

Thomas Merton said, “Your life is shaped by the end you live for. You are made in the image of what you desire.” The world we live in is a result of the desire of men. It is paramount that we women step more fully into that which we desire – own it, live it, breath it – if we are going to create change in the world.

Here’s what I desire: I desire a world that celebrates feminine leadership and exalts it to create healthy systems that are inclusive, compassionate, and fair. I desire meaningful relationships that are both intimate and impactful in the world. I desire increased connection to fast track a global consciousness that puts life at the center of everything we do.  What do you desire? I want to know. Let’s pool our desires and make it happen, sisters.


Speaker Highlight: Esther Perel on Love, Sex and Desire

by Chantal Pierrat

We are so excited to announce that we just added some serious ooh la la to the lineup for Emerging Women Live 2015.

The provocative Esther Perel will be joining us to talk about the tantalizing dance between modern love and desire, and how we can reclaim our feminine sexuality as a power source for life and business. Yes, please!

Just watch the first minute of this Esther’s TedTalk. We dare you to not hear a question that resonates with you:

Intrigued? Check out her badass bio:

Esther Perel is recognized as one of the most original and insightful voices on personal and professional relationships and the complex science behind human interaction. She is a best­-selling author, practicing psychotherapist in New York, organizational consultant for Fortune 500 companies, and regular speaker on the topics of erotic intelligence, trauma, conflict resolution and infidelity. Fluent in nine languages, the Belgian native is a cross­-cultural relationship philosopher, shifting the paradigm of our modern approach to relationships.

Esther points out that in our modern world, we want to experience sexuality not simply for survival or duty. She says, “This is the first time that we want sex over time about pleasure and connection that is rooted in desire.”

She invites us to wonder, “When you love, how does it feel? And when you desire, how is it different?” The push/pull between wanting grounded security and our need for imagination and adventure exists both in our intimate relationships and in the way we relate to our entrepreneurial endeavors.

Masterfully, Esther elucidates how we can reconcile this dichotomy with playfulness and curiosity to activate a truly fulfilling journey. “Sex isn’t something you do, eh? It’s a place you go. It’s a language. It isn’t just a behavior,” she says. That is feminine power in action.

Getting clarity around our loves and desires (and learning to merge the two) is just as crucial to our authentic success in life as a solid business plan.

Emerging Women Live is on a mission to bring both concepts into the forefront to help revolutionary women like you take full advantage of all arenas of consciousness, so you can have the greatest impact as you work to make meaningful change in your life, your community and the world.

Ready to own your wanting and align it with your plans for success?

We hope you’ll join Esther Perel, Brené Brown, Dr. Neha Sangwan, Dr. Jane Goodall and more at Emerging Women Live 2015. Don’t miss out on your ticket to personal and professional transformation!

Featured EWLive14 Speaker: Danielle LaPorte

by Chantal Pierrat

Danielle LaPorte is the creator of The Desire Map: A Guide To Creating Goals With Soul, author of the bestseller, The Fire Starter Sessions (with Random House/Crown), co-creator of Your Big Beautiful Book Plan, and soon to be publisher of DANIELLE Magazine. An inspirational speaker, poet, former think tank exec and business strategist, she writes weekly at DanielleLaPorte.com, where over a million visitors have gone for her straight-up advice — a site that’s been deemed “the best place on line for kick-ass spirituality”, and was named one of the “Top 100 Websites for Women” by Forbes.

We are thrilled to have Danielle LaPorte as a keynote speaker at Emerging Women Live 2014, October 9th-12th at the Sheraton in New York City. Read on and you’ll see why…

 

“How do you feel when you’re dancing? How do you feel when you’re reading a really great book?  How do you feel when your whole body is a “YES”? How do you feel when you’re in your zone? That’s you emerging. Your true self, your essential self, your soul… it is not something that is ‘out there.’ It is something that emerges.”

 

Danielle loves “preaching to the choir” and empowering women to find their joy through re-examining their relationship with desire. Using entrepreneurship as her “back door approach to having conversations about consciousness,” she helps us focus on desired feelings rather than desired outcomes to create lives that we love living.

 

“The real juice happens in conversation,” Danielle says, asking the audience of Emerging Women Power Party Seattle 2013 to call out concepts they want to hear her to address in her well-known outspoken style. Check out the video below to hear her talk about desire, discernment, vulnerability and more, and get excited for more Danielle LaPorte truth-bombs at Emerging Women Live 2014.

 

Danielle LaPorte is a keynote speaker at Emerging Women Live. If you are dedicated to living a fully expressed life, and you are starting or growing a business that thrives on authenticity, creativity, and the power of your unique self, Emerging Women Live is your tribe. Join us! Early Bird perks before July 31st.