Whose Money Is It Anyway?

Oh boy – we are talking money again, sisters! I can’t help it. Time and time again I am finding this topic to be the source of so much anxiety for women. Retirement, earning potential, glass ceilings, re-entering the workforce or leaving the J_O_B to become an entrepreneur. It all leads to the recurring bag-lady nightmare for me (am I the only one that has that?).

Regardless of our place in the journey, we seem to be in perpetual fear that there will never be enough, or that we will lose what we have, or worse, that we are fundamentally undeserving of anything above the bare minimum to survive.

In my case, my angst started when I left the snug comfort of my steady executive publishing job to start Emerging Women. I was traveling regularly to New York, LA, London, and Germany on an expense account. I had superfine outfits to support my super-groovy life. I bought a house in North Boulder (now known as NoBo – that should give you an idea) with my husband. I always had money for yoga, dance, and organic smoothies. I was set!

Then the goddess said “do your thing” and it all changed. I decided to leave the womb of a company I loved, an incredible mentor, and a decade of transformational personal and career growth to become an entrepreneur. What was I thinking?!?

Since then, I have wrung my hands, chewed my cheek, and even had to get a mouth guard to keep me from gnashing my teeth in the middle of the night. All from money anxiety. How was I going to support my family and this lifestyle to which I had become passionately accustomed?

I consider myself a successful woman. I make things happen, I am creative, a visionary, and I love helping women rise. And I rode on this energy for the first year of Emerging Women, taking personal and professional risks that were worth taking. As I followed the natural growth of EW, there seemed to be more and more pressure, more risk, and less cash. I found myself pushing and driving to manage the cash constraints to the point of exhaustion.

Luckily, I’ve found women I trust to help me take more ownership over my finances. They guide me and encourage me to really dig into old patterns while developing healthy, concrete habits to both grow my business and stay rooted in my personal finances.

Amanda Steinberg, founder of DailyWorth and WorthFM, is one of those women. If you haven’t yet, tune in to her Emerging Women podcast Worth It to hear how to get ready for the “perfect storm of opportunity” coming up around women and money.

Another woman I trust, Barbara Stanny, is my rock when it comes to moving my money mindset from survival to stability to affluence. If you’re looking for a similar shift, her Emerging Women podcast Sacred Success: A Woman’s Guide to Authentic Power and Affluence is a must-hear.

Nancy Levin has also been so important by reminding me that the real key to creating financial freedom isn’t changing what we do, it’s changing our limiting beliefs about how we feel—and that requires more than just learning how to invest. Here’s an Emerging Women Power Practice Boost Your Self Worth to Grow Your Net Worth to start uncovering and removing limiting shadow beliefs about worth.

But then one day I was talking to Tosha Silver, my go-to for all things surrender and divine, and she floated this concept that it’s NOT really my money. What the what? Whose is it?!

Tosha’s core message of working with the unknowable forces in the universe, co-creating your life in connection or in relationship to something greater than yourself, of letting go and trusting that the mystery will flow in a positive way for you if you truly offer yourself up to it, applies 100% to the realm of money as well. And that’s perhaps the most powerful, if not the most challenging, realm in which we can let the practice play out. Whoa.

Check out Tosha Silver’s long-awaited 8 part money course It’s Not “Your” Money: Fully Living From Divine Abundance. It starts on March 22nd, so nab your tickets now and let’s do the work together on releasing the blocks to receiving.

The first 3 women’s views help me check the boxes and dot the i’s, both externally and internally. And knowing that money ultimately does not belong to me allows me to surrender and not worry if I’m just a financial hot mess. All 4 of these women have shared wisdom that is freeing me from white-knuckle saving and a manic number crunching, allowing for a softer interplay of competence, worth, and trust.

What’s your money story right now? The more we talk about this “taboo” subject, the more opportunity we’ll give ourselves to, as Amanda Steinberg so beautifully puts it, grow stronger roots and freeing wings around our finances.

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